Today marks the second time En & Xuan watched a movie in the cinema (their first was "Smurfs" some months ago). They were full of anticipation since I told them last week about watching "Madagascar 3". As I prepared them last night that we have to leave our home by 10am this morning, lest we couldn't get any movie tickets, Xuan asked me numerous times "is it 10am yet?" from the moment I was awake till I reached for the door today. Challenging!!!
But it was all worth it. The munchkins laughed hilariously throughout the 90 minutes movie. They indulged themselves in a box of popcorn and enjoyed unobstructed view. Water bottle on standby for hydration, socks and cardigan kept them warm too. Whatever it takes to make my princesses comfortable while they sit back and enjoy!
And the result? Well, the constant recount of the movie scenes during our lunch at McDonalds goes to show how much they loved the movie. I'm sure there'll be more movie trips to come for the family!
Thursday, June 7, 2012
Wednesday, June 6, 2012
Twinship
I fetched the munchkins from the childcare centre this evening, and our walk-home conversation somehow led to the topic on criminals and putting the bad guys in jail. Then En asked "What is a jail?" so I had to describe roughly how a cell would looked and explain why criminals had to be put behind bars.
Me: There are bad guys who steal, rob, fight or even kill other people, so the police had to lock them up in cells.
En: Sometimes I fight with Chloe. Do we have to go to jail?
Me: Not for that kind of fight, darling. You girls just squabble at times, isn't it? Not the real kind of fight, right?
Xuan: (looking at En) Yea, we don't really fight because we are twins, right?
En: (nods in agreement) Yup, we just fight a bit then we laugh and be friends all the time. Hee...
Then the girls held hands and ran off together towards our gate. The beauty of twinship. Lovely...
Dear God, you must really love these girls enough to want to have them duplicated. And you must love me enough to let me have them! Thank you very much!!!
Me: There are bad guys who steal, rob, fight or even kill other people, so the police had to lock them up in cells.
En: Sometimes I fight with Chloe. Do we have to go to jail?
Me: Not for that kind of fight, darling. You girls just squabble at times, isn't it? Not the real kind of fight, right?
Xuan: (looking at En) Yea, we don't really fight because we are twins, right?
En: (nods in agreement) Yup, we just fight a bit then we laugh and be friends all the time. Hee...
Then the girls held hands and ran off together towards our gate. The beauty of twinship. Lovely...
Dear God, you must really love these girls enough to want to have them duplicated. And you must love me enough to let me have them! Thank you very much!!!
Sunday, May 6, 2012
Born again!
I couldn't believe I actually took this long to blog again... The reality of a working mother, and one that works 3 rotating shifts. However, what triggers me to return to this blog today is the all consuming joy that my munchkins both said the sinner's prayer with me today and committed themselves to accept Jesus Christ into their lives. 6 May 2012! A day to remember and praise the Lord for. Sharing my joy with all, and I can hear the angels rejoicing with me even at this moment! Amen.
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
Song: Living for Jesus
A very meaningful hymn which touched me so much earlier, during my Bible study on the book of Isaiah (on chapter 6). The song reminded me of why I heed His call in the first place to do what I'm doing now, and how I should go on to do what I'm called to do. The hymn goes like this:
Living for Jesus, a life that is true,
Striving to please Him in all that I do;
Yielding allegiance, glad hearted and free,
This is the pathway of blessing for me.
Refrain
O Jesus, Lord and Savior, I give myself to Thee,
For Thou, in Thy atonement, didst give Thyself for me.
I own no other Master, my heart shall be Thy throne.
My life I give, henceforth to live, O Christ, for Thee alone.
Living for Jesus Who died in my place,
Bearing on Calvary my sin and disgrace;
Such love constrains me to answer His call,
Follow His leading and give Him my all.
(Refrain )
Living for Jesus, wherever I am,
Doing each duty in His holy Name;
Willing to suffer affliction and loss,
Deeming each trial a part of my cross.
(Refrain )
Living for Jesus through earth's little while,
My dearest treasure, the light of His smile;
Seeking the lost ones He died to redeem,
Bringing the weary to find rest in Him.
(Refrain)
I ask the Lord to always remind me however difficult the task may be, I am merely a vessel called by God to do His work, not mine. And I ask the Spirit of God to constantly sharpen my mind, enflame my heart and energize my will to live by His grace for His honor and glory, and seek to please Him in every thought, word, deed, my all! Amen.
Living for Jesus, a life that is true,
Striving to please Him in all that I do;
Yielding allegiance, glad hearted and free,
This is the pathway of blessing for me.
Refrain
O Jesus, Lord and Savior, I give myself to Thee,
For Thou, in Thy atonement, didst give Thyself for me.
I own no other Master, my heart shall be Thy throne.
My life I give, henceforth to live, O Christ, for Thee alone.
Living for Jesus Who died in my place,
Bearing on Calvary my sin and disgrace;
Such love constrains me to answer His call,
Follow His leading and give Him my all.
(Refrain )
Living for Jesus, wherever I am,
Doing each duty in His holy Name;
Willing to suffer affliction and loss,
Deeming each trial a part of my cross.
(Refrain )
Living for Jesus through earth's little while,
My dearest treasure, the light of His smile;
Seeking the lost ones He died to redeem,
Bringing the weary to find rest in Him.
(Refrain)
I ask the Lord to always remind me however difficult the task may be, I am merely a vessel called by God to do His work, not mine. And I ask the Spirit of God to constantly sharpen my mind, enflame my heart and energize my will to live by His grace for His honor and glory, and seek to please Him in every thought, word, deed, my all! Amen.
Friday, February 11, 2011
Hello again!
Its been a really long while since I last posted. I had wanted to give up blogging. And I'm still struggling with it because now that I'm working 3 rotating shifts, other priorities in life had to take centre stage, and blogging is certainly not on the top of the list.
However, this blog came to mind again today. My day started off with me realising the uniqueness of the date 11-02-2011. Its a palindrome, like a word that reads backwards the same as it does forwards. So I suddenly thought I should write something on this interesting day. But what should I blog about? So much had taken place in the past months, yet I can't think of anything special to blog. In fact, all I had in my mind as I embarked on an hour-long journey to meet my dad was the options which the orthopaedic surgeon would offer my dad, and my dad's response to those options. So unconsciously, the thought of blogging got intercepted by my other trail of thoughts and ended up lost in transition.
Yet the Lord, as usual, never fail to answer my prayers and prove His faithfulness. My dad was full of praises for the surgeon (today's visit being their first meet up) and he agreed to the total knee replacement surgery with full confidence and assurance. Do you know what that translates into? It means increased mobility, reduced pain, lesser medication and more activities for my dad and the munchkins. His quality of life will improve tremendously and this is the outcome I desire for the longest time. My dad spent the bulk of his lifetime on his feet, working as an odd job labourer at the fishing port and later on, a hawker until his feet couldn't take the stress any further at the age of 63. It was those strong limbs of his that gave his 4 children the opportunity to go to school and a chance to lead a better life. Now that he's 68, all I wanted to do for him is to ensure he get to enjoy the rest of his life going places and be pain free. I cannot express how much I thank God for removing dad's stubborn resistance to seek treatment, and replacing that resistance with peace and confidence in a mere week. It takes more than a miracle which only God can deliver. Amen!
So once again, here I am, doing my little part of sharing the goodness of my Lord through blogging. Until I can leap and jump again with my dad, I hope to be able to drop by whenever I can to share the ups and downs of my busy life. Cheers.
However, this blog came to mind again today. My day started off with me realising the uniqueness of the date 11-02-2011. Its a palindrome, like a word that reads backwards the same as it does forwards. So I suddenly thought I should write something on this interesting day. But what should I blog about? So much had taken place in the past months, yet I can't think of anything special to blog. In fact, all I had in my mind as I embarked on an hour-long journey to meet my dad was the options which the orthopaedic surgeon would offer my dad, and my dad's response to those options. So unconsciously, the thought of blogging got intercepted by my other trail of thoughts and ended up lost in transition.
Yet the Lord, as usual, never fail to answer my prayers and prove His faithfulness. My dad was full of praises for the surgeon (today's visit being their first meet up) and he agreed to the total knee replacement surgery with full confidence and assurance. Do you know what that translates into? It means increased mobility, reduced pain, lesser medication and more activities for my dad and the munchkins. His quality of life will improve tremendously and this is the outcome I desire for the longest time. My dad spent the bulk of his lifetime on his feet, working as an odd job labourer at the fishing port and later on, a hawker until his feet couldn't take the stress any further at the age of 63. It was those strong limbs of his that gave his 4 children the opportunity to go to school and a chance to lead a better life. Now that he's 68, all I wanted to do for him is to ensure he get to enjoy the rest of his life going places and be pain free. I cannot express how much I thank God for removing dad's stubborn resistance to seek treatment, and replacing that resistance with peace and confidence in a mere week. It takes more than a miracle which only God can deliver. Amen!
So once again, here I am, doing my little part of sharing the goodness of my Lord through blogging. Until I can leap and jump again with my dad, I hope to be able to drop by whenever I can to share the ups and downs of my busy life. Cheers.
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
4th Birthday
This post came a little late this year. The fun and joy experienced when planning, organising and being present at the munchkins' 4th birthday celebration in the childcare centre still linger in me.
Here's princesses En and Xuan on 6 October, with the individual birthday cakes of their choice.
I cannot put into words how I feel when I saw them seated at the table, all dressed up, ready to receive the blessings and well wishes from their teachers and all their little friends. They were such a fortunate pair whose lives had been under the hands of the almighty God! I was so close to tears that day. That gentle voice within, shouting "Look! We've come so far, isn't it?" makes me want to cry. The sweet reminder that God watches over the 2 of them all the time, is overwhelming. Those moments where I had doubts, where I was down, where my faith was failing me, where my human strength couldn't take me, they were all but foolishness of my heart which blinded my eyes to the love of my Lord.
Thank You, Lord Jesus, for all that You've done for En and Xuan. They were beautifully and wonderfully made by Your precious hands. May they remember Your grace and Your love for them, and in return, love and praise You all the days of their lives. Teach them Your ways, not mine. Show them Your plans for them, and not mine. Guide them to fulfill Your purpose for them in their lives. Into Your precious hands, I commit my little ones. Amen.
Friday, September 3, 2010
Doubts
Today mark the end of the 3rd week of my clinical practicum to a surgical ward of the hospital I am bonded to. I have 4 more weeks to go before I return to books again (aka campus life).
As much as I still strong believe in, and am assured of, my calling to His purpose in this nursing career, I am prompted to start to pray about the discipline which I will enter into come January 2011. I need to know where I would be most needed in His purpose for my life.
You see, 2 years back, I felt I "might' be called to Palliative Nursing. End-of-life issues and caregivers' stress had always been close to my heart. I wonder sometimes if it stems from regrets that my family, including my late mother, was ill prepared for her death and issues related to her demise. I am not saying we had a hard time coping then. Even the most well prepared families had their share of grief and struggles after losing their loved ones. But I believe things would have been a lot easier if someone, like a palliative nurse, had step in to prepare the family, including my mother, for the impending issues ahead before her eventual departure. I was a educated, 19-year old young adult then and would certainly be able to comprehend complex issues on hand. Having said that, such services weren't available back in the early 1990s, so no one's to be blamed though.
Now, as I encounter deaths in the hospital and patients being diagnosed with cancer, and having spoke to a few of these patients, their family members as well as nurses who were in palliative care previously, I'm beginning to doubt if I can handle the emotional roller coaster of the role of a palliative nurse. Perhaps I needed more exposure? Perhaps I needed a good mentor? Or maybe it was never God's intention to put me in this role and it was my own imagination all along???
I need answers which only my dear Lord can provide. But you, my friend, can pray with me in my search for an answer and direction. Thanks!
Give us your strength, Lord.
Because sometimes things get tough, and we are ready to quit.
Give us your love, Lord.
Because sometimes people reject us and we are tempted to hate.
Give us your eyes, Lord.
Because sometimes life get dark and we lose our way.
Give us your courage, Lord.
Because often we are put under pressure and its hard to do what is right.
Give us yourself, Lord.
Because our hearts were made for you and we will not rest until we rest in you.
Amen.
As much as I still strong believe in, and am assured of, my calling to His purpose in this nursing career, I am prompted to start to pray about the discipline which I will enter into come January 2011. I need to know where I would be most needed in His purpose for my life.
You see, 2 years back, I felt I "might' be called to Palliative Nursing. End-of-life issues and caregivers' stress had always been close to my heart. I wonder sometimes if it stems from regrets that my family, including my late mother, was ill prepared for her death and issues related to her demise. I am not saying we had a hard time coping then. Even the most well prepared families had their share of grief and struggles after losing their loved ones. But I believe things would have been a lot easier if someone, like a palliative nurse, had step in to prepare the family, including my mother, for the impending issues ahead before her eventual departure. I was a educated, 19-year old young adult then and would certainly be able to comprehend complex issues on hand. Having said that, such services weren't available back in the early 1990s, so no one's to be blamed though.
Now, as I encounter deaths in the hospital and patients being diagnosed with cancer, and having spoke to a few of these patients, their family members as well as nurses who were in palliative care previously, I'm beginning to doubt if I can handle the emotional roller coaster of the role of a palliative nurse. Perhaps I needed more exposure? Perhaps I needed a good mentor? Or maybe it was never God's intention to put me in this role and it was my own imagination all along???
I need answers which only my dear Lord can provide. But you, my friend, can pray with me in my search for an answer and direction. Thanks!
Give us your strength, Lord.
Because sometimes things get tough, and we are ready to quit.
Give us your love, Lord.
Because sometimes people reject us and we are tempted to hate.
Give us your eyes, Lord.
Because sometimes life get dark and we lose our way.
Give us your courage, Lord.
Because often we are put under pressure and its hard to do what is right.
Give us yourself, Lord.
Because our hearts were made for you and we will not rest until we rest in you.
Amen.
Friday, July 23, 2010
Updates
Its been months since I last posted in this blog. I did not forget its existence. I made a decision to spend more time with the kids (on top of my studies), hence the missing act from the blog as well as my other online hobbies.
As of today, the munchkins are about 2 months away from their 4th birthday. They are a lot more expressive nowadays, can hold a decent conversation and they play with each other most of the time. The "naughty corner" had not been used for a long time now as discipline takes a rather different approach for them at this age. The girls are more reasonable and are able to accept verbal warnings. I haven't seen melt downs for quite a while and I really, really thank God for that.
For the past few months, quality time with the munchkins were spent indoor playing dough, doing colouring, playing blocks, watching DVDs and occasionally reading together. At times, the adults were requested to leave the room because we don't belong to their "school" or whatever environment the girls' imagined themselves to be in. Sometimes I get pretty amused by how En and Xuan could understand one another's imagination and play along. You know, like when the things they talked about were virtual (like catching a fish without a rod or net) or the environment they verbalised literally doesn't exist (they pretended to be mermaids from the deep Oceania). Kids are a lot more than you think they are!!!
We go outdoor most of the weekends now. If I need to work on my assignments on a particular weekend, Di and YaYa will bring the girls out without me. The munchkins had gotten more "acquainted" with the malls than before. McDonalds were not encouraged in the past when they were younger. We now visit the fast food chain every fortnightly. Furthermore, with the munchkins' allergy conditions and asthma under control, they are now allowed to have ice-cream when we dine out. So you can imagine how much they love outings, especially after Sunday school! They can name the various malls we've brought them to and state their preferences. Needless to say, those malls with ice cream parlours and Kiddy Palace gets top votes in their list of "My favourite Shopping Malls".
A family portrait taken for Father's Day in May, so here's one to share. Seated on my thighs is Xuan. En has got her arms around me.
I may not be able to post as often as I'd love to, but I'll continue to try. Perhaps when I'm back in the hospital in mid August, I'll have more time to write again. I'll "see" you around. God bless!
As of today, the munchkins are about 2 months away from their 4th birthday. They are a lot more expressive nowadays, can hold a decent conversation and they play with each other most of the time. The "naughty corner" had not been used for a long time now as discipline takes a rather different approach for them at this age. The girls are more reasonable and are able to accept verbal warnings. I haven't seen melt downs for quite a while and I really, really thank God for that.
For the past few months, quality time with the munchkins were spent indoor playing dough, doing colouring, playing blocks, watching DVDs and occasionally reading together. At times, the adults were requested to leave the room because we don't belong to their "school" or whatever environment the girls' imagined themselves to be in. Sometimes I get pretty amused by how En and Xuan could understand one another's imagination and play along. You know, like when the things they talked about were virtual (like catching a fish without a rod or net) or the environment they verbalised literally doesn't exist (they pretended to be mermaids from the deep Oceania). Kids are a lot more than you think they are!!!
We go outdoor most of the weekends now. If I need to work on my assignments on a particular weekend, Di and YaYa will bring the girls out without me. The munchkins had gotten more "acquainted" with the malls than before. McDonalds were not encouraged in the past when they were younger. We now visit the fast food chain every fortnightly. Furthermore, with the munchkins' allergy conditions and asthma under control, they are now allowed to have ice-cream when we dine out. So you can imagine how much they love outings, especially after Sunday school! They can name the various malls we've brought them to and state their preferences. Needless to say, those malls with ice cream parlours and Kiddy Palace gets top votes in their list of "My favourite Shopping Malls".
A family portrait taken for Father's Day in May, so here's one to share. Seated on my thighs is Xuan. En has got her arms around me.
I may not be able to post as often as I'd love to, but I'll continue to try. Perhaps when I'm back in the hospital in mid August, I'll have more time to write again. I'll "see" you around. God bless!
Friday, April 2, 2010
Reflections
An hour ago, I had a short chat with Di when I arrived home from my last day in KK Women and Children's Hospital (clinical posting). Di shared good news about his colleague's wife being successfully pregnant after years of trying to conceive with history of previous miscarriage. We were really happy for them. And Di was truly thankful it didn't take us long to get pregnant when we finally decided to start a family back then.
I, on the other hand, am more thankful than ever, after spending the past one month in the paediatric, obstetric and gynaecology ward. When I witnessed premature infants arriving in the ward with complex medical conditions or awaiting for corrective surgery, I can't thank the Lord more for a relatively smooth pregnancy, allowing me to carry the munchkins to term and giving them good health. Women with reproductive disorders also reminded me to count my blessings each day. What more can I ask for...
Thank You, Jesus, for everything!
Were there no God, we would be in this glorious world with grateful hearts and no one to thank.
- Christina Rossetti
I, on the other hand, am more thankful than ever, after spending the past one month in the paediatric, obstetric and gynaecology ward. When I witnessed premature infants arriving in the ward with complex medical conditions or awaiting for corrective surgery, I can't thank the Lord more for a relatively smooth pregnancy, allowing me to carry the munchkins to term and giving them good health. Women with reproductive disorders also reminded me to count my blessings each day. What more can I ask for...
Thank You, Jesus, for everything!
Were there no God, we would be in this glorious world with grateful hearts and no one to thank.
- Christina Rossetti
Saturday, March 13, 2010
Thursday, March 11, 2010
Paediatrics
It has only been 3 days into my paediatric posting and I am feeling down and depressed, on one hand, yet tremendously grateful on the other. In fact, I am rather convinced paeds are not my cup of tea, and I certainly hope this discipline would not be my calling. I struggled to keep my professional composure at work and found it challenging to cope with the emotional roller coaster ride the moment I am out of the hospital.
I love children and I think they are beautiful gifts from God. So it pains my heart to see the little ones suffering. Oh, I forgot to mention I am posted to paeds surgical ward. Looking at infants or toddlers born with congenital conditions and hoping for a chance to lead a normal life post surgery is heart wrenching. Of course there are a handful of them who are admitted for minor conditions and their speedy recovery plus angelic laughter are a joy to many.
However, there is this one child who makes my heart ache even at this very moment. She was admitted for second degree burns (scalded by boiling water) due to abuse/negligence. My heart sank the moment I saw her. Wrapped up like an ancient Egyptian mummy, I could tell she is about the munchkins’ age. The quiet child, who refused to talk for the first 2 days, finally opened up and answered my few questions yesterday after I gave her Princess and Thomas & Friends stickers. Later on, she cried softly when we wheeled her for dressing change. After coaxing her, I promised to get her some Strawberry Shortcake stickers today. And I hope these little items would bring pain relieve and joy to her on her journey to recovery.
I spoke briefly about her condition to the munchkins last night. Told them about her burns and the fact that no one truly cares for her (I have not seen any visitors except for police officers and social workers). En graciously (lived up to her name) offer to give the girl her Thomas & Friends piano while Xuan fret over which of her favourite toys to give away. In the end, I chose a ball which changes colour when it is thrown in the air, and asked if Xuan would like to give away the ball. She nodded with a smiley face and that warms my heart.
So now, I’ll have to go pack the stickers and toys in a nice paper bag and get ready for work. Keep praying for me too, that nothing will happen at work that I'd be unable to handle. Thank you!
I love children and I think they are beautiful gifts from God. So it pains my heart to see the little ones suffering. Oh, I forgot to mention I am posted to paeds surgical ward. Looking at infants or toddlers born with congenital conditions and hoping for a chance to lead a normal life post surgery is heart wrenching. Of course there are a handful of them who are admitted for minor conditions and their speedy recovery plus angelic laughter are a joy to many.
However, there is this one child who makes my heart ache even at this very moment. She was admitted for second degree burns (scalded by boiling water) due to abuse/negligence. My heart sank the moment I saw her. Wrapped up like an ancient Egyptian mummy, I could tell she is about the munchkins’ age. The quiet child, who refused to talk for the first 2 days, finally opened up and answered my few questions yesterday after I gave her Princess and Thomas & Friends stickers. Later on, she cried softly when we wheeled her for dressing change. After coaxing her, I promised to get her some Strawberry Shortcake stickers today. And I hope these little items would bring pain relieve and joy to her on her journey to recovery.
I spoke briefly about her condition to the munchkins last night. Told them about her burns and the fact that no one truly cares for her (I have not seen any visitors except for police officers and social workers). En graciously (lived up to her name) offer to give the girl her Thomas & Friends piano while Xuan fret over which of her favourite toys to give away. In the end, I chose a ball which changes colour when it is thrown in the air, and asked if Xuan would like to give away the ball. She nodded with a smiley face and that warms my heart.
So now, I’ll have to go pack the stickers and toys in a nice paper bag and get ready for work. Keep praying for me too, that nothing will happen at work that I'd be unable to handle. Thank you!
Thursday, February 4, 2010
Why Blog?
Some people blog to document their journey in parenting, career development or relationships with their better half or higher being, etc. Others choose blogging as a means to express their innermost thoughts and feelings, whereas for some, it is a mode to share with others their love for their hobbies (eg. photography, music, handicraft, etc.). No matter what their reason is behind blogging, I enjoy reading blogs because they reveal a lot about the writers, even though you may not know them personally.
But there are blogs written by my friends and they sometimes bring tears to my eyes. These are people I know personally yet we do not openly discuss our thoughts and feelings when we meet. Why? Because we are Asians and that’s it! It is in our blood and that’s hard to change. Our parents were reserved and we didn’t have good role models to guide us in expressing ourselves in our younger days. No doubt we are a lot better than our parents in terms of communication now, but still, something is lacking in the Asian (or rather Chinese) culture which makes it a challenge for us to pour our hearts out to our friends. And I guess it didn’t help to have another barrier to overcome – pride. Blogging, however, became a great avenue for some of us to pen our feelings and share with friends and strangers (pardon me for using this term if you happened to be reading this blog for the first time).
I got to know a few high school friends better when they started blogging. We don’t discuss what was posted when we meet face to face, but we do drop each other little notes (or exchange text SMSes) when one is feeling down. This morning, I spent a whole 2 hours reading the blog of a high school friend who just passed away on 30 January 2010. I was tearing most of them time when I read about her fight against cancer for the past 15 months. The fact that she left behind a pair of twins made me think what I’d do if I were to be in her shoes. Will I be as strong? What will I say to my own twins if I were to face similar situation? I really don’t know…
Nonetheless, I hope all my friends will continue to blog, and I will try my best to catch up on your blogs whenever I can. It may not be the best way to keep in touch, but it is one of the ways in which we can share and support one another, ya? Let's not wait till the next call to gather at a friend's funeral wake to catch up with one another, okie? “See” you around and take care!
But there are blogs written by my friends and they sometimes bring tears to my eyes. These are people I know personally yet we do not openly discuss our thoughts and feelings when we meet. Why? Because we are Asians and that’s it! It is in our blood and that’s hard to change. Our parents were reserved and we didn’t have good role models to guide us in expressing ourselves in our younger days. No doubt we are a lot better than our parents in terms of communication now, but still, something is lacking in the Asian (or rather Chinese) culture which makes it a challenge for us to pour our hearts out to our friends. And I guess it didn’t help to have another barrier to overcome – pride. Blogging, however, became a great avenue for some of us to pen our feelings and share with friends and strangers (pardon me for using this term if you happened to be reading this blog for the first time).
I got to know a few high school friends better when they started blogging. We don’t discuss what was posted when we meet face to face, but we do drop each other little notes (or exchange text SMSes) when one is feeling down. This morning, I spent a whole 2 hours reading the blog of a high school friend who just passed away on 30 January 2010. I was tearing most of them time when I read about her fight against cancer for the past 15 months. The fact that she left behind a pair of twins made me think what I’d do if I were to be in her shoes. Will I be as strong? What will I say to my own twins if I were to face similar situation? I really don’t know…
Nonetheless, I hope all my friends will continue to blog, and I will try my best to catch up on your blogs whenever I can. It may not be the best way to keep in touch, but it is one of the ways in which we can share and support one another, ya? Let's not wait till the next call to gather at a friend's funeral wake to catch up with one another, okie? “See” you around and take care!
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
Critical Thinking
The concept of critical thinking is defined as “an analytical process that can help you think through a problem in an organised and efficient manner” (Barbara, A. P.). While it is normal to assume our kids will eventually acquire critical thinking skills, I've never actually thought about when that should happen, until I realised it had already manifested itself in En and Xuan over the past few weeks.
I used to give them excuses for not fulfilling their requests, and they never question why, though I sometimes get that "question mark" look on their faces. Then I realised one morning that my munchkins had "grown" without me noticing again. And what triggered that revelation was this.
We were at the mall around 10am on New Year's Day. Most of the shops were not opened yet, so when En asked if she could go for a kiddy ride, I conveniently answered "The shops are not opened yet, darling." Now, she knew exactly where the kiddy rides are located within the mall even though there wasn't a single one in sight. And I didn't quite like the idea of kiddy rides because they are costly. For the benefit of my overseas friends, a single ride could cost up to $2 at times!!! And you know kids don't normally stop at one ride (alright, alright... they're not so bad. They do stop at one sometimes when I tell them I only have one coin in my purse). She kept quiet for a few seconds, then she said "But the kiddy rides are not inside the shops!" I was speechless, and yes, I told her right in her face "I am speechless!" before we proceed to catch a few rides.
Last weekend, the girls were at their grandparents' place. While toss and turning at nap time, En asked YaYa "When I wake up, we will go to Orchard Road lah?" You see, "lah" is a local expression which the childcare centre is trying their best to educate the kids not to include in their English conversation. So Xuan turned and said to En "Teacher XXXX said not to use the word 'lah'." En quickly answered her sister " We can use 'lah' only when there's Xuan, En and YaYa. When mommy and papa is around, we cannot use 'lah'." I mean, what was she thinking???!!!
Well, if that is the start of the munchkins' critical thinking skills development, I guess I am in trouble. Have to start brushing up on my critical thinking skills to come up with a new list of excuses to counteract theirs. Kekekeke... Just kidding! I'm looking at my girls in a whole new perspective and I just want to tell them "Come on! Surprise me!!!
I used to give them excuses for not fulfilling their requests, and they never question why, though I sometimes get that "question mark" look on their faces. Then I realised one morning that my munchkins had "grown" without me noticing again. And what triggered that revelation was this.
We were at the mall around 10am on New Year's Day. Most of the shops were not opened yet, so when En asked if she could go for a kiddy ride, I conveniently answered "The shops are not opened yet, darling." Now, she knew exactly where the kiddy rides are located within the mall even though there wasn't a single one in sight. And I didn't quite like the idea of kiddy rides because they are costly. For the benefit of my overseas friends, a single ride could cost up to $2 at times!!! And you know kids don't normally stop at one ride (alright, alright... they're not so bad. They do stop at one sometimes when I tell them I only have one coin in my purse). She kept quiet for a few seconds, then she said "But the kiddy rides are not inside the shops!" I was speechless, and yes, I told her right in her face "I am speechless!" before we proceed to catch a few rides.
Last weekend, the girls were at their grandparents' place. While toss and turning at nap time, En asked YaYa "When I wake up, we will go to Orchard Road lah?" You see, "lah" is a local expression which the childcare centre is trying their best to educate the kids not to include in their English conversation. So Xuan turned and said to En "Teacher XXXX said not to use the word 'lah'." En quickly answered her sister " We can use 'lah' only when there's Xuan, En and YaYa. When mommy and papa is around, we cannot use 'lah'." I mean, what was she thinking???!!!
Well, if that is the start of the munchkins' critical thinking skills development, I guess I am in trouble. Have to start brushing up on my critical thinking skills to come up with a new list of excuses to counteract theirs. Kekekeke... Just kidding! I'm looking at my girls in a whole new perspective and I just want to tell them "Come on! Surprise me!!!
Friday, December 4, 2009
Faith like a Mustard Seed
And Jesus said unto them, "Because of your unbelief; for verily I say unto you, if ye have faith as a grain of mustard seed, ye shall say unto this mountain, `Remove hence to yonder place,' and it shall remove. And nothing shall be impossible unto you. - Matthew 17:20 (NKJV)
For years I have been equipped with the knowledge of this Bible verse. In fact, my name is a constant reminder of this verse! However, my faith can get as weak as one can imagine, especially where the munchkins are concerned. Every time my children are down physically, my faith is challenged. Don't get me wrong. I do not doubt my Lord and Saviour. But my defences aren't as strong at times like these... And HE knows. So He works in His special way to bring me to higher grounds, just so I could see better and further.
The night she was ill, I had En sat on my lap and cradled her little head in my arms. She was drowsy as a result of the medication, but still she managed to pray with me for complete healing. Our little prayer ended with a simple "We believe in Your healing and we receive. Amen."
A few minutes later, in a moment of weakness, and perhaps out of desperation, I asked her "Darling, do you really believe Jesus can heal you?"
"Yes", replied En with such affirmative tone.
"Why?" asked the foolish mommy, who was at the verge of breaking down from stress and fatigue.
"Because Jesus is good and He is happy!" was the answer from the 3-year-old.
From that very moment, I had to ask my Lord for forgiveness of sin. My kid understands the basic, simple truth which I'm so blinded to at times --- The Lord is able and willing to heal (or forgive, teach, guide, prosper, etc. Just fill in the blank!) And all He ask of us is simply believe.
To date, we are still praying and believing for complete healing for En, and I still have my moments of weakness at times. But I am reminded of the simple truth every time I am tempted to "stray". And I cannot thank the Lord enough for His grace that has kept me going. Praise the Lord.
For years I have been equipped with the knowledge of this Bible verse. In fact, my name is a constant reminder of this verse! However, my faith can get as weak as one can imagine, especially where the munchkins are concerned. Every time my children are down physically, my faith is challenged. Don't get me wrong. I do not doubt my Lord and Saviour. But my defences aren't as strong at times like these... And HE knows. So He works in His special way to bring me to higher grounds, just so I could see better and further.
The night she was ill, I had En sat on my lap and cradled her little head in my arms. She was drowsy as a result of the medication, but still she managed to pray with me for complete healing. Our little prayer ended with a simple "We believe in Your healing and we receive. Amen."
A few minutes later, in a moment of weakness, and perhaps out of desperation, I asked her "Darling, do you really believe Jesus can heal you?"
"Yes", replied En with such affirmative tone.
"Why?" asked the foolish mommy, who was at the verge of breaking down from stress and fatigue.
"Because Jesus is good and He is happy!" was the answer from the 3-year-old.
From that very moment, I had to ask my Lord for forgiveness of sin. My kid understands the basic, simple truth which I'm so blinded to at times --- The Lord is able and willing to heal (or forgive, teach, guide, prosper, etc. Just fill in the blank!) And all He ask of us is simply believe.
To date, we are still praying and believing for complete healing for En, and I still have my moments of weakness at times. But I am reminded of the simple truth every time I am tempted to "stray". And I cannot thank the Lord enough for His grace that has kept me going. Praise the Lord.
Saturday, November 28, 2009
Priotise
First of all, I'd like to thank all who expressed their concerns and prayers for En. After some aggressive treatment including oral steroids and Combivent via the nebuliser (apparently the Ventolin inhaler wasn't effective this time because En's breath was too shallow for the medication to get to the lungs), the wheezing began to fade. Doctor advise to put her on long term antihistamine until the weather change for the better. In fact, the same apply to Xuan as well since she is also hypersensitive to weather changes.
En stayed at home for the entire week because in the midst of the wheezing episode, she suffered stomach flu as well. (Poor gal!) One could tell her immune system had been badly compromised. Anyway, we thank God we learnt our lessons from the previous experience (where she lost consciousness after few days of diarrhea) and sent her for medical review right away, so she didn't have to suffer as much this time round.
Now that En is much better, I have to start to catch up with my studies and be prepared for the challenges starting in 2 week's time. My schedule is so ridiculously packed, I sometimes wonder how I can survive this semester without neglecting my family.
Then I am reminded of my personal philosophy "In life, you win some, you lose some". Can I afford to lose some marks, live with lower grade and pass my exams with less than satisfactory results? YES, I can. Because the grades doesn't matter as much as my family members does to me. When I learnt that my cousin's teenage son died in a car accident over the weekend, I was badly "hit" as well. Even though I knew my nephew is now home with the Lord, I cannot imagine the loss and grief my cousin had to bear. She loved him so much...
Any of you having problems prioritising? What does it cost you to let go of some of the not-so-important appointments, gatherings or even commitments, just so you could spend some quality time with your family? Think, think, think...
En stayed at home for the entire week because in the midst of the wheezing episode, she suffered stomach flu as well. (Poor gal!) One could tell her immune system had been badly compromised. Anyway, we thank God we learnt our lessons from the previous experience (where she lost consciousness after few days of diarrhea) and sent her for medical review right away, so she didn't have to suffer as much this time round.
Now that En is much better, I have to start to catch up with my studies and be prepared for the challenges starting in 2 week's time. My schedule is so ridiculously packed, I sometimes wonder how I can survive this semester without neglecting my family.
Then I am reminded of my personal philosophy "In life, you win some, you lose some". Can I afford to lose some marks, live with lower grade and pass my exams with less than satisfactory results? YES, I can. Because the grades doesn't matter as much as my family members does to me. When I learnt that my cousin's teenage son died in a car accident over the weekend, I was badly "hit" as well. Even though I knew my nephew is now home with the Lord, I cannot imagine the loss and grief my cousin had to bear. She loved him so much...
Any of you having problems prioritising? What does it cost you to let go of some of the not-so-important appointments, gatherings or even commitments, just so you could spend some quality time with your family? Think, think, think...
Time is like a river. You cannot touch the same water twice because the same water that had passed will never pass again.
- author unknown.
Saturday, November 21, 2009
Insomnia
Tonight is going to be a sleepless night for me. Something I have not experienced for a long, long time...
En is wheezing badly again, and the symptoms doesn't seemed to go away despite administering 4 dozes of Ventolin at one go. The fear of her turning breathless grips me like nothing I can describe. I am physically tired yet my mind couldn't "switch off" because I am in fear - fear of having to send my girl to the emergency department again while I watch helplessly at a corner...
Those of you parents out there whose kids suffer from asthma may think I'm over-reacting. I am, indeed, and I must confess that my fears could be unfounded to some extend. But my heart weighs a million tonnes because I am guilty. It was exactly the same time last year when she developed similar signs, and I, being the full time caregiver, dismissed it as common cough symptoms. The foolishness in me simply didn't realise my girl was in need of help, leading to her subsequent episodes of chest infections, surgery and finally bronchopneumonia. The damage done was much more than expected and some were permanent. She is more susceptible to infections and airway obstruction (call it asthma if you like) ever since. Whenever she falls ill due to respiratory issues, I feel responsible. I know I need to get out of this bottomless guilt pit but...
God has forgiven me. It is the big ME in me who finds it hard to forgive myself. Pray for me, my friends. I needed your prayers... Got to go serve the midnight dose of Ventolin now. I bet I can hear the coughing even in my sleep...
En is wheezing badly again, and the symptoms doesn't seemed to go away despite administering 4 dozes of Ventolin at one go. The fear of her turning breathless grips me like nothing I can describe. I am physically tired yet my mind couldn't "switch off" because I am in fear - fear of having to send my girl to the emergency department again while I watch helplessly at a corner...
Those of you parents out there whose kids suffer from asthma may think I'm over-reacting. I am, indeed, and I must confess that my fears could be unfounded to some extend. But my heart weighs a million tonnes because I am guilty. It was exactly the same time last year when she developed similar signs, and I, being the full time caregiver, dismissed it as common cough symptoms. The foolishness in me simply didn't realise my girl was in need of help, leading to her subsequent episodes of chest infections, surgery and finally bronchopneumonia. The damage done was much more than expected and some were permanent. She is more susceptible to infections and airway obstruction (call it asthma if you like) ever since. Whenever she falls ill due to respiratory issues, I feel responsible. I know I need to get out of this bottomless guilt pit but...
God has forgiven me. It is the big ME in me who finds it hard to forgive myself. Pray for me, my friends. I needed your prayers... Got to go serve the midnight dose of Ventolin now. I bet I can hear the coughing even in my sleep...
Sunday, October 18, 2009
Birthday Prayer
Dear Lord
I’ll turn 36 in less than an hour. The birthday cake was cut yesterday, together with the girls and Di, in the comfort of our home. It was so sweet of Di to get YaYa a birthday cake in advance as well, so we had 2 different cakes for breakfast! Yummy!
And there was also the lunch and tea session with my pals last Saturday, and another lunch and tea session with my siblings on Wednesday. I thank You that I am indeed very blessed with so many loved ones around me, and I really have nothing more to ask for.
Reeling through the past year, I thank You for answering all my prayers. The list of answered prayers is too long to be posted here, so I thought I’d just share a few below:
- I asked for strength and courage to face challenges, as well as wisdom to discern situations, and You were there for me whenever I needed guidance, be it in school or at work.
- I asked You to prosper Di, and he did really well at work.
- I asked for favour upon the munchkins in the childcare centre, and they were well loved by their teachers, the staff and all their friends (including those from Playgroup and K2, which I just came to learn about recently). Thank You very much!
The coming year would still be a challenge to me as I continue to play the role of a wife, mother, daughter, sister, student, employee, employer, friend, etc. Family still, and will always, come first, and I also hope this coming year would be a year of spiritual breakthrough for my family. This is especially so for the children as I try to demonstrate to them the importance of loving You wholeheartedly. May You continue to be the head of this house hold.
In Jesus' name, amen.
And thou shalt love the LORD thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might. – Deuteronomy 6:5 (NKJV)
Friday, October 9, 2009
Imperfection
Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and cometh down from the Father of lights, with whom is no variableness, neither shadow of turning. - James 1:17 (NKJV)
As I sit by in the munchkin's bed earlier, watching the 2 girls sleep peacefully, I started wondering if I had been a good mother to them. What can I do to make myself a better mother?
Through moments of quiet, self reflection, I wondered if I was too hard on them (and myself) at times, despite constant reminders (to myself) to let them grow as kids ought to. Then it strike my mind that striving to become perfect is not even half as challenging as coming to terms with imperfection. And to my precious, dearest Lord, thank you for reminding me that the beauty of life lies in its imperfection. Thank you very much, once again!
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
Three Years Old
The munchkins turned three yesterday. Three!!! Wow! All it seemed to take was the blink of an eye and my sweetie pies are now preschoolers.
Looking back, I love having them as toddlers despite those difficult moments when communication was a major challenge. Now that we've overcome the "language barrier", I somehow missed their babbles and having to guess what they really wanted from their incoherent behaviour and seemingly meaningless speech fashion. Strange...
Nevertheless, their 3rd birthday was a memorable one to the munchkins, or so I believe. Their previous birthdays (only twice to be exact!) were all planned by me and there wasn't much involvement on their part except to be present during the party and cut the cakes. This time round was different. They started off the day with the family (aka Di, myself and Ya Ya) singing them a birthday song and a palm size birthday cake for each of them for breakfast. Its "tradition" that each of them should have their own birthday cake, even if its a small one, to remind us they are two separate individuals even though they are identicals. Gong Gong was sweet enough to purchase those cakes the night before (thanks, dad!). The girls left for school after that, looking forward to receiving their much bigger birthday cake and the afternoon tea party with their friends in the childcare centre.
By 3pm, Di, myself, Gong Gong and Teng (my sister) were outside the school gate while the teachers changed the girls into their "party" dress. Once we entered the school premise, we were greeted by a group of sleepy-heads (some looked as if they were still in dreamland after their nap). There, right in the front of a cubicle, was a wooden table with a Hello Kitty cake on it. En & Xuan were seated in front of the cake like princesses from the royal family. Kekeke...
Okay, side track a bit on the choice of the cake. About 3 months ago, I started asking what cake they would like to have for their birthday. And over the 3-month period, I gathered answers like Strawberry Shortcake, Princess Ariel, Snow White, Aurora, Belle, Hello Kitty, Little Einsteins, Pooh Bear, Dora, Mickey Mouse, Barbie Mariposa, Cars (aka Lightning McQueen), Tweety, blah blah blah... They were changing their minds every other day, so I decided to pick my personal favourite - yes, the kitty without a mouth or otherwise known as Hello Kitty or HK in short. Anyway, the munchkins kind of rekindled their love and interest for the kitty lately when Teng bought them each a HK candy house and HK doll house. San-yee even promised to buy them HK birthday presents from Sanrio Land on her holiday trip to Japan.
Back in the school, while the children were happily feasting on the cake, all the Playgroup kids had at least one portrait taken by Di. Di was amazed at how responsive the kids were and he was glad the children enjoyed having their photos taken by him. A plus point for the photographer! Then I was told to be prepared to bring a portion of the cake back home because I overestimated the size of the cake (I ordered a 3kg instead of 2kg). Surprisingly, most of the kids asked for a second helping and the entire cake was nearly gone in 30 minutes. Whew!!! I'm so comforted to know the kids love the cake.
En & Xuan received their birthday gifts from the teachers and friends before we left with them. We had coffee at the mall before leading them to Kiddy Palace. Both were so excited they were allowed to choose a gift of their choice. En chose a Cinderella top with matching skirt while Xuan opt for a layered, pastel coloured dress. They had another set of white skirts and a new "Barbie and The Three Musketeers" DVD as bonus gifts. All the gifts were paid for by Da-yee (thank you so much!!!). We then left the mall to fetch san-yee from RP and there, the girls received their loots from Sanrio Land wrapped in pretty HK packaging.
And guess what? Its not over yet.. . Xiao-yee is returning from Beijing this weekend, hence there will be another special delivery of birthday gifts next week. In addition, plans have been made to take the girls off school for 2 days so I can spend some time with them since I'm having my term break. So much for their birthday activities! No wonder they are so reluctant to return to school today... :p
Looking back, I love having them as toddlers despite those difficult moments when communication was a major challenge. Now that we've overcome the "language barrier", I somehow missed their babbles and having to guess what they really wanted from their incoherent behaviour and seemingly meaningless speech fashion. Strange...
Nevertheless, their 3rd birthday was a memorable one to the munchkins, or so I believe. Their previous birthdays (only twice to be exact!) were all planned by me and there wasn't much involvement on their part except to be present during the party and cut the cakes. This time round was different. They started off the day with the family (aka Di, myself and Ya Ya) singing them a birthday song and a palm size birthday cake for each of them for breakfast. Its "tradition" that each of them should have their own birthday cake, even if its a small one, to remind us they are two separate individuals even though they are identicals. Gong Gong was sweet enough to purchase those cakes the night before (thanks, dad!). The girls left for school after that, looking forward to receiving their much bigger birthday cake and the afternoon tea party with their friends in the childcare centre.
By 3pm, Di, myself, Gong Gong and Teng (my sister) were outside the school gate while the teachers changed the girls into their "party" dress. Once we entered the school premise, we were greeted by a group of sleepy-heads (some looked as if they were still in dreamland after their nap). There, right in the front of a cubicle, was a wooden table with a Hello Kitty cake on it. En & Xuan were seated in front of the cake like princesses from the royal family. Kekeke...
Okay, side track a bit on the choice of the cake. About 3 months ago, I started asking what cake they would like to have for their birthday. And over the 3-month period, I gathered answers like Strawberry Shortcake, Princess Ariel, Snow White, Aurora, Belle, Hello Kitty, Little Einsteins, Pooh Bear, Dora, Mickey Mouse, Barbie Mariposa, Cars (aka Lightning McQueen), Tweety, blah blah blah... They were changing their minds every other day, so I decided to pick my personal favourite - yes, the kitty without a mouth or otherwise known as Hello Kitty or HK in short. Anyway, the munchkins kind of rekindled their love and interest for the kitty lately when Teng bought them each a HK candy house and HK doll house. San-yee even promised to buy them HK birthday presents from Sanrio Land on her holiday trip to Japan.
Back in the school, while the children were happily feasting on the cake, all the Playgroup kids had at least one portrait taken by Di. Di was amazed at how responsive the kids were and he was glad the children enjoyed having their photos taken by him. A plus point for the photographer! Then I was told to be prepared to bring a portion of the cake back home because I overestimated the size of the cake (I ordered a 3kg instead of 2kg). Surprisingly, most of the kids asked for a second helping and the entire cake was nearly gone in 30 minutes. Whew!!! I'm so comforted to know the kids love the cake.
En & Xuan received their birthday gifts from the teachers and friends before we left with them. We had coffee at the mall before leading them to Kiddy Palace. Both were so excited they were allowed to choose a gift of their choice. En chose a Cinderella top with matching skirt while Xuan opt for a layered, pastel coloured dress. They had another set of white skirts and a new "Barbie and The Three Musketeers" DVD as bonus gifts. All the gifts were paid for by Da-yee (thank you so much!!!). We then left the mall to fetch san-yee from RP and there, the girls received their loots from Sanrio Land wrapped in pretty HK packaging.
And guess what? Its not over yet.. . Xiao-yee is returning from Beijing this weekend, hence there will be another special delivery of birthday gifts next week. In addition, plans have been made to take the girls off school for 2 days so I can spend some time with them since I'm having my term break. So much for their birthday activities! No wonder they are so reluctant to return to school today... :p
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